There are days when I am big time jealous of stay at home moms. Don’t get me wrong, I know SAHM’s do a lot of work, but honestly for me, it’s the kind of work that I envy from time to time. There are times I would love my full-time job to be a home maker. But even if that were the case for me, right now, I would not be able to accomplish the clean and organized home I desire.
As I previously wrote, I have set a few goals for 2015. One of those goals is to work on my back and my weight. Basically, I am too uncomfortable to do a lot of work for extended periods of time. It’s incredibly frustrating!
I was an athlete in my teens. I played volleyball, softball, and did some weightlifting. I was able to go and lift and do anything I wanted physically because I was strong and in shape. Now, I can’t. I want to, but the extra weight on my body and my back make it nearly impossible to keep up.
There are moments I really struggle with these issues. I truly WANT to be able to do it all. I’ve found myself in tears more than once from my inability to clean the whole house in 2 hours. Some nights I just want to make dinner or finish a chore without being in agony. When I say agony, I’m not exaggerating. I’m considering a trip to the doctor to discuss pain management while I work my way back to a healthier lifestyle.
The incredibly frustrating part of all of it, is I have had to dump a lot of the work load onto my husband. He already works in an incredibly physical job at an Assisted Living Center. I swear the man must walk 5 miles a day just at his job. It’s not fair of me to ask him to take on any more than he already is to take care of our family.
So, what’s the solution?
Being a fairly frugal person has made this a difficult decision. However, there comes a time when you have to make some tough decisions. Right now, the tough decision is to hire people here and there to help with house and/or yard work, so that I can focus on getting stronger.
As crazy as it sounds, we hired someone to come and mow/mulch our leaves this year. We got a crazy good deal on it, $25.00, for a BIG yard and a lot of leaves. An amazing thing happened after the work was finished. I felt less stressed. My husband was practically giddy that we didn’t spend something like 8 hours (not an exaggeration) raking and burning leaves. Even better, I didn’t have to spend the next day in bed doped up on pain meds from an aching body. There are still a few spots we’re going to have to handle, but an hour of work is a lot less intimidating than a full day of work.
Most of all, I am confident that taking this step, to admit I am defeated to an extent, has opened my eyes to what’s really important. Taking care of me and my husband first, whether it costs us some money or not. Sure, it could go towards paying off debt, but in a way it is. It’s going towards my health debt, so that I can feel better, so that I can fight for myself and make my life the way I want it.
Did you ever feel like hiring help was giving in or that you’re lazy for it? Tell me about it!by